House season 4 finale

WOW! What an absolutely amazing finale!

By far my favourite single episode of House bar none. After seeing Amber in the first few epsiodes who would have thought her death would be so moving. Watching Wilson and House in action was a pleasure and seeing Wilson break down was heartbreaking.

Next season we get to see what happens in the aftermath of Amber's death. Will House and Wilson go their separate ways? What will happen to 13 now that she knows she has Huntingtons?

Dexter Season 3 thoughts

After being disappointed with season 2 I was relieved to discover that Dexter was back on track with a brilliant 3rd series. The main reason for my enjoyment had to be the addition of Miguel Prado to the mix, along with his psychotic brother Ramone, the Prado's certainly kept me entertained.

Dexter didn't off many people this season but his growing friendship with Miguel ended up leaving a few bodies. It was was a little odd seeing Dexter having trouble figuring out how much of a nut job Miguel was because he's usually on to these things pretty quickly. But now Dexter is a married man and with a baby on the way season 4 is going to be interesting.

Deb had a pretty good year too, getting her shield and bagging her man Antoine. Although one loose end that didn't get any closure was the whole IA investigation on Quinn which seemed to vanish. Hopefully the storyline was just getting started and it concludes next season.

I've got high hopes for season 4, hopefully they can build on this seasons stellar work.

House Season 4

I'm absolutely loving Season 4 of House. I think the addition of all the cast members was a little claustrophobic to begin with, I quite like the final 6 (I'm on episode 8) with Kutner and Cutthroat Bitch as my two favourite characters from the new intake. It's also nice to see Chase, Cameron and Foreman back although it would have been better if their returns were delayed a little so they made more of an impact. The only gripe so far is with the fact that there isn't enough Wilson so far!

The Prisoner

I hadn't seen the original but when I read the synopsis for the remake by AMC I was excited. With Sir Ian McKellen in a starring role I thought this mini series couldn't fail. Unfortunately it did. The opening few scenes were promising but soon things just became a blurry confusion and it soon became hard to follow. It was a chance missed I'm afraid.

Dexter Season 3

I absolutely hated Season 2 of Dexter for two very good reasons. Firstly the death of Sergeant James Doakes who was quite easily the baddest ass of all bad asses. It was such a shame the character got killed off as he was a great antagonist for Dexter. But the main reason was the character Lyla, it was a terrible storyline and I just wasn't convinced. And her British accent just sounded so off it kind of got annoying. Those two reasons were why I put off tuning in to season 3 until recently and to be honest I'm not hooked as I was with season 1.

The murder of Oscar is obviously going to take up most of the season and I'm sure it will end up with Miguel Prado suspecting Dexter at some point. The case itself doesn't sound that great but I'll have to wait and see if things improve on that front. The storyline involving Debra seems a bit more intriguing and I'm sure Deb will end up helping out Internal Affairs. Then we have the whole Rita being pregnant situation which I'm really not too sure about, but I should have seen it coming with all the sex Dexter and Rita were having in the first episode!

Hopefully things will pick up and Dexter will hit the heights of season 1.....

The Tournament

I'm not sure why I decided to watch The Tournament, a film that came and went without a murmur. The premise of a battle to the death tournament has been done to death the last being The Condemned starring Stone Cold Steve Austin. But despite knowing the film would probably suck, I still decided to invest ninety minutes of my life to this and I'm glad I did. Mainly because I was supposed to paint the garden fence, but it began to rain so I saved myself from getting wet. The film though was terrible!

If you're looking to sign a bad ass black man for a role you go for Samuel L Jackson, if you can't afford him you may settle for Laurence Fishbourne, if you're on a tighter budget you may have to plump for Ice Cube or Wesley Snipes, but if you're really desperate then you're left with Ving Rhames who plays said bad ass in The Tournament. Ving isn't exactly bad in this, but he's not great either, then again the script and dialogues he had to work with meant he was on a loser from the get go.

Joshua Harlow (Ving Rhames) is the reigning champion of an underground tournament hosted by some dude called Power (Ian Cunnigham). The rules of the tournament are simple, 30 of the worlds top assassins are pitted against each other, the winner gets $10,000000 dollars and the title of the Worlds No. 1. Seven years later having retired from a life of violence, Joshua is lured back in to the tournament after his wife is murdered and one of the other assassins competing in the tournament is alleged to be the culprit. Meanwhile, the assassin with a heart, Lai Lai Zhen (Kelly Hu) finds herself having to protect alcoholic priest Father McAvoy (Robery Carlyle) after a surgically implanted tracking device used to keep tabs on the assassins finds its way in to Father McAvoys coffee. The two go on the run as a host of assassins close in on them.

As mentioned earlier, the story is nothing new, in fact The Tournament lacks innovation and variation from its predecessors making it just another movie with an ensemble cast and lots of gruesome kills. With the cast at his disposal, Scott Mann missed out on an opportunity to make a half decent movie but instead we get a rehashed movie that carries very little entertainment value.

Only watch this if the only other option is Death Race!

Hells Kitchen vs Top Chef

I've been watching loads of Top Chef lately and I couldn't help but make comparisons with Hell's Kitchen. So I thought I'd compare the two shows and decide which is better!

Contestants (or Cheftestants as I read somewhere!)
Top Chef win this hands down, the competitors are all talented and have a decent amount of experience. Hell's Kitchen picks less talented individuals, sometimes even picking people who work in waffle houses or steak houses.

The Prize
Top Chef offers a cash prize of $10,000, a feature in Food and Wine magazine and the opportunity take part in a 'food classic' whatever one of those may be! Hell's Kitchen claims that the winner gets to become head chef at a 5 star hotel's restaurant. Are you kidding me? There is no chance any 5 star establishment is going to allow a reality show contestant to be the executive chef in their kitchen! Besides the proof of the pudding lies with previous contestants, Heather from Season 2 was named senior chef not executive chef at Terra Rosa (she's now a sous chef in Season 6!) and The Rock from season 3 had only a year as head chef at his location before his contract expired and it appears season 4 champ Christina isn't doing anything major either. So it appears that HK sometimes bends the truth when describing some of the prizes!

Challenges
Hell's Kitchen has a few challenges which are always fun to watch including the taste challenge where they are blindfolded and have to guess the ingredient by taste alone. But mostly the challenges are pretty basic like how to prepare shrimps or who can make the most fresh spaghetti. Meanwhile Top Chef's challenges seem to be fairly different each week usually involving creating dishes with various ingredients pre-selected by the guest judge. My favourites include the challenge of creating something using ingredients from a petrol station and a vending machine!

Format
HK starts off with the men vs the women who have their own kitchen and have to cook for a dining room full of customers where as TC chefs in the most part cook for themselves (although team challenges seem to appear more as the seasons go on). HK is probably a more pressurised enviornment and with so many personalities and a foul mouthed, bad tempered head chef makes for some major drama!

Hosts/Judges
TC has Padma Lakshmi as the host of the show, she's not bad, very easy on the eyes and seems to know a fair bit about fine dining. However, someone needs to be fired for having Katie Lee Joel as the host in season 1, she was truly terrible. The main judge is Tom Collichio, personally I've never heard of him but he seems like quite a fair judge and definitely knows his stuff when it comes to cooking. Gail Simmons from Food & Wine Magazine is the other judge, she's kind of annoying but not too bad in small doses. On HK, obviously Gordon Ramsey is the master. Despite the fact that the show concentrates on portraying Gordon as an agressive loud mouth bully, he seems to pull it off without being disliked. In the UK version of HK, a more supportive and friendlier Gordon was on display, something I believe is closer to his real identity. Other bit part players include the sous chefs Scot and Gloria (who has since been replaced by Heather from Season 2) who have very little screen time and Jean Phillipe the Belgian Maitre d' who has become more and more of a comedy actor in recent years.

Verdict
Although HK is enjoyable, I personally believe it has started to become too formulaic. Every season we have a couple of hopeless cases, one guy who has to drop out for medical reasons and lots of shouting and swearing from Gordon. Top Chef, despite being a cooking show at heart has had some pretty major dramas to keep the viewers entertained. The challenges are more creative and tougher and the cheftestants have a lot more expertise when it comes to cooking.

Top Chef wins it!

Top Chef - Season 1 vs Season 2

OMG! What a shocker! I tuned in to see season 3 and was met with a All 4 Star challenge pitting the final four from Season 1 against the final 4 from season 2! This is like going out to dinner with your ex girlfriend and your current girlfriend!

Nice to see all the contestants made it back, although LeAnne was replaced by Stephen as she is now a producer on Top Chef! Dave is a bigger douche than Stephen or Marcel in my opinion, I can't stand him.

The fact that both Stephen and Marcel, the two antagonists in their respective series seems a little bit of coincidence. Also, isn't it a bit of a disappointment that both previous winners failed to win the challenge?

Harold looks way too intense! He actually looked like he was planning on how to dump Padma's body when she was announcing the ingredients for the elimination challenge!

It's so weird seeing Stephen and Ilan on the same show! It's freaking me out! It's like they have no right to be sharing the same space at the same time!

I'm not feeling Elia's new look.

I'm rooting for Season 2, I like them all. From Season 1 I only like Harold.

Woah! Season 3 judging the challenge!

I reckon Season 1 have taken it with ease, the judges didn't seem to dig Season 2's offerings.

Damn, the two previous Top Chef's got slated! They were probably the worst dishes of the whole challenge!

Season 1 laid the smackdown on Season 2 big style.

Top Chef Season 2 final thoughts

Some final thoughts on another excellent season of Top Chef which I can now say is way better than Hell's Kitchen!

Firstly, Padma Lakshmi is far superior to Katie Lee Joel (some viewers on the Bravo boards have nicknamed her Katie Bot!) Although I have some issues with the way she speaks, I believe that is partly down to her speaking with an American accent. She seems to know a fair bit about food and she's often sharing her thoughts with the judges.

Ilan deserved to win the show as he was a consistent performer throughout the entire process and I thought Marcel was lucky to be in the final. I had Sam nailed on for the final but his last dish let him down and he was let loose.

The Marcel bullying was uncomfortable to watch at times but the guy really didn't help himself. He was always looking to annoy and aggravate his fellow contestants. However in a way I began to respect him a little because despite being a loner he carried on and every time he won a challenge it wound the others up big time!

Cliff went over the line when he assaulted Marcel, but Sam needs to share some some of the blame, he should have said he wasn't going to get involved from the get go thus stopping Cliff going in for the kill. Cliff was going to get eliminated anyway so it was no big deal for the judges.

I think the final challenge there was one segment I believe was fake. When the chefs were picking who they wished to cook for both Sam and Michael voted for Marcel which I find incredibly unlikely after all the animosity between Sam and Marcel.

Overall a solid season and very enjoyable!

Community

My favourite new show of the season comes in the form of Community. Five episodes in and I'm already hooked. It's got such a great cast of characters and the location is something a little different.

The Jeff and Britta love story arc is the main focus of the show but they are the least interesting of the cast in my opinion. Abed and Pierce are great characters but for me Senor Chang is the man! I absolutely love his crazy turn as the groups Spanish teacher. So far so good, lets hope it can keep up the momentum....

Torchwood

Torchwood - The Children of Earth aired in the UK a couple of months ago and the adverts looked pretty good so I thought I would check this show out even though I wasn't a huge Doctor Who fan. I decided to watch the pilot episode rather than watching Children of Earth just in case the whole series was awesome!

I must say, I wasn't too taken with the episode. It still comes across as a bit amateurish when you compare it to other shows, especially those from the US. However it might be worth another view, as John Barrowman is very good as the charismatic Captain Jack Harkness and the welsh bird is bearable.

Top Chef - Season 2

No sooner had I finished viewing season 1, I started on season 2!

Looks like the producers took action and got rid of Katie Lee Joel pretty sharpish. A good move in my opinion, although the jury is still out on new host Padma Lakshmi, sure more than matches Katie on looks. I can't believe Salman Rushdie was tapping that!

Suyai was the first to get chopped this season which was a shame as I was hoping she would stick around, just for the fact that she pronounces 'herbs' in the correct manner!

Looks like Marcel is going to be the resident douchebag for the season, just his hair alone is enough reason to hate him already! Micheal looks like he's going to be amusing for a while but will no doubt end up being eliminated fairly early on.

So far there aren't many people that are coming across as favourites but I'm sure that will sort itself out over the next couple of episodes.

Harold should stick to being in the kitchen! Although it was nice to see last seasons winner again, the guy looked so awkward in front of the camera and crowd!

From the previews for next weeks show things look like they are going to be heating up!

Top Chef Finale

Thoughts from the season 1 finale as I viewed it:

It was very noble of Stephen to say he wanted to work for Tiff because he knew (and we knew) that Dave was going to pick Harold as his chef.

Dave is rather annoying and very ungracious. I'm not sure when Tiff actually abused him so much for him to feel so strongly against her. I felt sorry for Tiff because it was obvious her team was not backing her 100%.

Dr Melfi from the Sopranos is one of the judges!

Oh no! Dave did all the desserts and the judges loved that the best about Tiffani's menu!

Why do Americans

Damn! Tiff did some serious lying about the desserts! She said she had some input in the desserts but we all know that Dave did them all! Booooo! As if she ever had a chance of winning anyway!

As the program reaches it conclusion, I am disliking Tiffani more, she is actually quite ungracious!

Harold wins! No surprise there! Funnily enough I picked both Tiffani and Harold as potenital stars and they made it to the final. LeeAnne deserved to be in the final three though.

The catchphrase "Please pack your knives and go" is really lame!

Top Chef Season 1 - Thoughts

I have to say I was pretty impressed with this show from the get go, I have to say it's probably better than Hell's Kitchen! Unlike HK, most of the chefs on TC appear to know a fair bit about food and are not coached at any point. Plus HK is more about Gordon Ramsey and the contestants are just a side show.

Here are some random thoughts from the show:

I can't believe LeAnne (sp?) was eliminated in favour of Dave! LeAnne was solid throughout the entire season whilst Dave spent most of it crying!

I actually liked Tiffani but I'm shocked at how badly thought of she is! I think her determination has backfired a little as she can come across as rude but watching her get ganged up on at the reunion show was a little uncomfortable to watch.

Fair play to Andrea for having such a great attitude, even after being sold out by Miguel she didn't bitch or moan, she accepted it and showed no ill feeling toward him.

Ken is a jack ass! The guy was totally pissed in the reunion show (as were most of the others) and he didn't do himself any favours. That said, Stephen stepping up to him was quite amusing.

The reunion show came across as fake and kind of took some of the reality away from the show if you catch my drift! Up till then, the essence of the show was the cooking and the tasks but the reunion show just reminded us that it's just another reality show and cheap laughs and insults are good for ratings.

Something bothers me about the host Katie, she just seems to lack any charisma and it's difficult to find her likable! Tom on the other hand has some personality and comes across well on the screen. Not a big fan of Gail Simmons especially after the wedding episode where she flicked her hair and struck a pose when she was introduced!

Bones Season 4 Finale

Hmmmmmmmm.......

I just watched the finale of Bones season 4 and I have to say I was less than impressed. The whole dream sequence was confusing and the plot was very limited. I liked how they worked all the characters of the show in to the storyline but it was a pretty lame episode. Zach was brought back but did nothing but stand around in the background!

The episode started with Booth and Brennan shagging and then revealed that the pair were husband and wife and the Jeffersonian was in fact a nightclub. I'm hoping that the producers were testing the waters with the possibility of getting Booth and Brennan together, because on the evidence of this episode alone it just wouldn't work! Why can't they just be friends!

Here's hoping Booth makes a quick recovery!

Top Chef season 1

My interest in TV food shows continues with the discovery of Top Chef, the cookery version of the Apprentice! Twelve chefs compete to win $10,000, a state of the art kitchen and a spread in a top culinary magazine. I'm 5 episodes in to the season and I'm already hooked! There are some really interesting characters in there and there's already plenty of heat outside of the kitchen!

My favourites so far include Harold, quiet but capable. he does his work with minimal fuss, a dark horse contender. Tiffany is a feisty red head who seems to know her stuff too and is always looking to do something a little special. Meanwhile Stephen is the arrogant, cocky prat of the group thinking he's above everyone else, which is fantastic as these shows are great when there's a pantomime villain to boo at!

Lets hope the rest of the season is as good as the first 5 episodes!

What I'm watching now....

How I Met Your Mother - Series 4
Community - Series 1
Top Chef - Series 1
Heroes - Season 3

Hell's Kitchen UK - Finale

I was surprised Linda won the contest as she appeared to be the weaker chef of the two finalists. I was firmly rooting for Ade but it wasn't to be. I watched this series with zero expectations but was surprised at how entertaining it turned out to be. Claudia's inclusion over Angus was a disappointment but other than that it was still a solid series. Hopefully for the next series they can get a few more faces in so we can eliminate celebs quicker!

The Proposal

Sandra Bullock is hot and Ryan Reynolds was hilarious in Van Wilder so I had medicore expectations for this rom-com. How wrong I was! It was shit!

Bullock is one of those hard ass exec types who treats her staff like crap, her assistant/secretary Ryan Reynolds gets the worst of it. But it transpires that Margret (Bullock) is Canadian and her visa has expired which means she has to return to Canada and apply for a new visa or be deported. The snag is that her bosses will replace her if she has to return to Canada (bit stupid of the bosses as I'm guessing it can't be that hard for a high powered publisher to get a visa!). Margret has an idea, she pretends to be engaged to Andrew her assistant in order to solve her visa problems. Andrew wanting to further his career agrees to play along with the charade. Margaret and Andrew fly off back to Andrew's home in Sitwa, Alaska where the couple face up to his parents, grand mother and ex girlfriend.

Reasons why I didn't like the film:

1. Sandra couldn't pull off the 'bitch boss' role at all. Glen Close in The Devil Wears Prada was the perfect 'Bitch Boss' where as Sandra just came across as a bit lame.

2. I just noticed how abnormal Ryan Reynolds' forehead is!

3. The ex girlfriend was on the scene but did nothing! There was no conflict, no cat fighting, not even any bitching!

4. I just didn't buy the whole thing where they fell in love. It all seemed a little forced.

Poor film. Sandra must do better, I fear Ryan Reynolds can't do better.

1/5

Hell's Kitchen UK - Series 4 episode 3

Watching the third episode (yes I'm sticking with it for now!) all I have to say is that Jody Latham is an utter dickhead. He is so cocky, arrogant, smug and annoying. Early favourites are Ade and Bruce.

Hell's Kitchen UK

Having watched the first two episodes of the latest series of Hell's Kitchen UK and I have to admit I am probably going to leave it there. Firstly it looks like the budget must have been slashed because the format has now changed with only one kitchen and 8 celebs. Probably the worst change has to be the ommission of Angus Deyton in favour of the rather annoying Claudia Winkleman.

Another gripe I have is the fact that Marco Pierre White is forced to act like some kind of psycho and he is often either sharpening his knife or walking around like he's just murdered someone and really enjoyed it. Last series Marco was very supportive which complemented the abrasive part of him. As for the celebs involved Ade Edmondson is probably likeable and already Anthea Turner and Hubby Grant Bovey are extremely annoying and smug. The others are OK and it's always funny listening to Miss Dynamite's accent!

Not sure if I'll carry on watching or switch to Hell's Kitchen with Gordon Ramsey for series 6.

Bones - Season 4 Episode 1

Why is it that when the Brits appear in a American show, their accents sound so much more obvious? Also, I can't recall Indira Verma's accent properly but why did she and all the other Brits in this episode sound so posh? All the Brits sounded like they were Americans doing a bad english accent! The other annoying part of this epsiode was the use of London landmarks such as Trafalgar Square and the Houses of Parliament as back drops. I think the viewer was quite aware that Booth and Brennan were in London, there was no need to force it down our throats!

This was also the first Zach-less epsiode, his role having been replaced by Clark Edison who has a very weird nose! By the end of the episode he left so it looks like rotating interns will be the norm this season. The case itself wasn't very interesting and Booth and Brennan looked a bit out of place in London. It's a shame because I thought Season 3 was brilliant and everything up til the revelation of Gormogon's apprentice was superb. But I'm willing to give this show another bone (See what I did there?!!!)!

Hell's Kitchen - Series 5 Finale

I fell so behind with HK that a new series was already in full swing and I still hadn't watched the finale of series 5. Part of the reason for my HK rejection was the fact that it was abundantly clear that Paula and Danny would be the two finalists. I must admit I was a little surprised that Danny won it in the end as Paula had been pretty impressive during the entire process. Bring on HK 6, hopefully it'll be a bit more engaging than this last one!

Quick Notes

Quick notes on some movies I've seen recently...

Transformers - The Revenge of the Fallen - I went in with zero expectations and walked away thinking it was pretty good! The bot on bot action was amazing as ever, although at times it was a little confusing trying to work out the Autobots from the Decepticons. No doubt a third installment will be on it's way.

Bruno - Some parts were hilarious, other parts were just a bit too much for me to be honest. Unlike Borat, the majority of this film was staged, so it lacked the edge of Borat. I've always though the character of Bruno was a little weak to begin with but fair play to Sasha for going as close to being gay as possible for a straight man!

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince - A very good film, very enjoyable but could have done without the lovey dovey rubbish! Damn Severus Snape for killing Prof Dumbledore, but I have a feeling he will put everything right!

Race to Witch Mountain - Where as Harry Potter is very enjoyable, in essence it is still a kids movie, the same can be said about the Rock's latest flick Race to Witch Mountain. But unfortunately RTWM is rubbish, a shame because the Rock is a decent actor with great screen presence which is why he is wasted in this lame sci fi bore.

The Taking of Pelham 123 - Denzel is back with a bang! A lot of people have complained that this Tony Scott effort is not a patch on the original, but seeing as though I haven't seen the original, I thought this was pretty good. Both Denzel and John Travolta put in solid performances, there is plenty of action and the plot moves along at a steady pace. Good old fashioned guys movie!

Chuck

Watched the season finale to Chuck today and I have to say it was a solid episode. What I can't understand is why the network wanted to cancel it! The good news is that Chuck will be back next year but the bad news is that it's been cut down to only 13 epsiodes.

One thing I didn't like about the ending was when check uploaded the new intersect in to his brain he learnt kung fu! Whilst it was cool watching Chuck kick some ass for a change, I hope it's not permanent, the reason Chuck is so likeable is because of his down to earth character. Watching Chuck turn in to a bad ass spy just takes away from his appeal and besides we have Colonel Casey for that!

Here's hoping next season Chuck picks up where it left off this year!

Awesome in Awesome!

Just heard a rumour that one of my favourite Bollywood Actors, Anil Kapoor (of Slumdog Millionaire fame) will be starring in one of my all time favourite TV shows - 24! Great seeing Anil branch out in to mainstream Hollywood, he's a very underrated star in Bollwood circles these days.

America's Got Talent

Jerry Springer has been replaced by a guy called Nick Cannon and I have to say he's a vast improvement. The American version seems to be very formulaic, the first act to come on is always awful and they steadily get worse. Then we get some decent acts, a few more rubbish ones and then we end up with the sob story at the end with the act being fantastic. Too predictable!

Parks & Recreation

I just watched the first season of Parks and Recreation and I have to say I wasn't very impressed. The fact that this show was billed as a spin off to The Office put too high an expectation on this, something that it isn't able to live up to. Amy Poehler is quite annoying, I'm assuming she's aiming to do a Micheal Scott but it doesn't really come off. The other charcters don't get enough scope and we don't really know much about them. The only exception would be the Tom Haverford character who is the office slacker played brilliantly by Aziz Ansari.

The show has been renewed for a second season (why?) so they must have some big plans for this it. Hopefully the producers will keep the show down to 6 episodes rather than giving it a full season as I really want to like this programme but I'm failing to do so at the moment.

The Hoff

The Hoff is a legend! I love his enthusiasm on America's Got Talent! He makes up for old misery guts Piers!

The Office (US) Season 4

Season 4 of The Office now viewed. This was the season that was heavily affected by the wriers strike so we only got 14 episodes. This series was probably the best I've seen so far, lots of character development and Pam and Jim together at last!

My two favourite episodes in this season came back to back and featured the troubled relationship between Micheal and Jan. Deposition (Episode 8) was hilarious thanks to Micheal cocking up the interview for Jan's lawsuit against Dunder Mifflin for unfair dismissal. But it was also pretty sad when Micheal got to hear that Jan did not rate him as a manager and that David Wallace (DM head honcho) didn't really consider him as a serious contender for Jan's old job. We also got to see how little Jan cared about Micheal when she submitted his personal diary as evidence in the lawsuit. But in between the sadder moments we got some comic gems like when Micheal drops his catchphrase 'that's what she said' during the lawsuit hearing and then tried to back track without much luck.

The following episode titled 'Dinner Party' delves deeper in to Micheal and Jan's strained relationship. This is very much apparent during the 'tour' of the house where it's obvious Jan dominates and Micheal is forced to the sidelines. In quite a sad moment, it is revealed that Micheal sleeps on a stool at the foot of the bed whilst Jan takes the whole bed because she has 'space issues' Things steadily get worse as the night goes on and Dwight invites himself dragging along his old babysitter as his date! Things eventually spill over and Jan smashes Micheal's beloved plasma TV with his beloved Dundie award!

One other person who really came in to prominence this season was former office temp turned high flying exec - Ryan. As the season wore on, the now semi-bearded Ryan went from trying to do his job well to grade A douchebag. In the epsiode 'Night Out' we learn that Ryan is a drug addict and gets his ass whooped by a bunch of girls. But Ryan gets his just desserts when he is arrested in the season finale for fraud and carted off by the cops. Goodbye Ryan and goodbye Dunder Mifflin Infinity!

The season finale saw the exit of a Dunder Mifflin regular Tobey as he headed off for Costa Rica, but not before he was given a rock with a note saying 'suck on this' from Micheal! Talking of Tobey, he was involved in one the most akward moments of the season when he patted Pam on the knee which turned out to be a full on grope! Tobey's replacement Holly, played by the awesome Amy Ryan (she's awesome because anyone who was on The Wire automatically becomes awesome!) clicks with Micheal despite a shaky start. The best part of Amy's debut was her interaction with Kevin who she thinks is 'special' thanks to some misinformation from Dwight!

Series 5 is shaping up to be a cracker thanks to the introduction of Holly and the fact that Jan is pregnant (even though Micheal is not the father) Plus what will become of the love triangle that is Andy - Angela - Dwight! And will Jim get to propose to Pam?

Chuck

Chuck has surey got to be the best show on TV right now. Not only is Zachary Levi excellent as the geek turned spy, but we get to see Yvonne Strahovsky get dressed (and undressed) every week!

Spoilers!

Being one of those people who doesn't get around to watching shows until long fater they have aired, spoilers have become a major problem. After I watch a really good episode of a TV show, I like to go on line and find a decent review of the show and see if others had the same opinion as I. It's also a good way of picking up things you may have missed the first time round.

Unfortunately, I seem to inadvertently find things out that I really shouldn't. So here's a few things I have spoiled for myself by web browsing and unwittingly clicking on links that revealed something I really didn't want to know! The spoilers in RED are the ones I have yet to see!

The Shield
Lem's death (Wikipedia)
The end of Monica Rawlings (TV Squad)
Shane kills himself and his family (TV Squad)
Julien joins the Strike Team (Wikipedia)

House
Cameron and Chase get together (TV without Pity)
House loses his cane (TV Squad)

Bones
Dr Zach Addy assists a serial killer (Wikipedia)
Booth & Boone share a snog (Sky One)

The Apprentice UK
Firing of Paula (Radio 5 Live)

Hell's Kitchen
Paul and Danny the final 2 (TV without Pity)

The Apprentice US
Joan Rivers in the final (possibly the winner) (TV without Pity)

The Office
Micheal Scott leaves Dunder Mifflin

I'm sure there is plenty more, so I will update this post when I can.

The Shield

Just finished watching Series 4 and 5 of the Shield and I have to say they were amazing. At the start of Season 4 we find the Strike Team have split up and gone their own way and Aceveda has now moved on to the council. The new captain of Farmington, Monica Rawling comes in and puts her faith in Vic Mackey to head up her new street team. I think season 4 definitely defined two characters that I was a bit undecided on. Firstly Aceveda showed his true colours and his deal with Antoine Mitchell showed that his ambition of becoming mayor was more important than that of the death of two police officers. Meanwhile, Shane Vendrell proved him to be a prize jack ass. Shane got himself mixed up with Antoine Mitchell and had to be bailed out by Vic otherwise he would have been toast. Glen Close was absolutely brilliant in her role as Monica Rawling and the scene where she realises Aceveda and Phillips have canned her is superb.

Season 5 saw the arrival of Forest Whitaker as IAD officer Kavanagh who turns out to be one of the most hated indiviuals in the history of the Shield and that is all down to Whitakers performance. The war between Whittaker and Mackey is epic and each episode the tension is cranked up a little bit more. The final episode where Lem is killed by Shane was emotional in so many ways, you hated Shane for doing it, but you could also feel his anguish as he felt he had no choice. The Shield is only second to the Wire when it comes to cop shows. And to think, I was brought up watching the Bill!

Britains Got Talent

I'm not a huge fan of reality TV and although I was a little intrigued by the act Signature from last year, I've managed to avoid Britain's Got Talent for the first two seasons. That all changed when I watched an epsiode at work one night and these weird and wonderful people from across the country had me hooked. Watching Susan Boyle was one of those moments of the year that everyone was talking about. The eventual winners Diversity along with their rival dance group Flawless brought us some straight up funky dancing. With father and son combination Stavros Flatley we got the laughs and with Two Grand, the grandfather and grandaughter Opera singing duo we had the emotion.

The Susan Boyle phenomena kicked off shortly after her peformance in round one but the most surprising aspect of her rising fame was how well recieved she was in America. The Yanks went nuts for the Scot culminating in her appearance on Oprah. But along with the instant fame came the reality that some people are not made for that kind of constant media attention and it was soon apparent that Boyle was cracking under the pressure. Meanwhile acts like Diversity and Shaheen (the 12 year old singer) got on with their job without the media frenzy. Diversity brought something fresh in each of their 3 performances and deservedly won the contest. I hear Susan Boyle checked her self in to the Priory shortly after the show ended.

I tried watching the American version the other night, but to be honest, Jerry Springer just doesn't have the same kind of charm as the brilliant Ant and Dec. Roll on next year!

The Apprentice - Episode 6

It finally happened, Noorul Choudhury was the 6th person to be fired by Sir Alan Sugar. Lets face it, it's the one that's been long over due. Having said that, had Noorul not been brought back to the boardroom, Sandhursts finest, Ben would surely have gone!

The task this week was to sell ten items of varying values. Philip was PM on his team and ignored Lorraine the entire day as she tried to tell him that a rug he said was worthless could actually be worth a lot more. She was right, but some how Philip managed to pull a sale out of thin air by selling the rug to a passer by on the street!

Our friend Noorul tried to sell a skeleton to a student, but rather than trying to negoiate high, Noorul was once again struck by his silence disease and Ben had to step in and close the deal at £60. In the end, Ben and his team were the losers and Ben bought Noorul and Debra back to the boardroom. Ben is a nasty pice of work and is all mouth. He seems to lack commonsense and all he does is shout above everyone in the boardroom. Debra is another gobby one and I really don't like her, she even had the audacity to shout at Nick Hewer! Finally we saw some spark from Noorul as he went down fighting, but alas it was too little too late.

Ben is a little arrogant prick, he needs to be shot, but I doubt he's going to go anytime soon, I found Debra to be overly aggressive and all she does is moan. Yasmina is annoying but she seems to get the job done whilst Philip is capable but not all that he makes himself out to be. Mona in my opinion is hanging on by the skin of her teeth, she's toast as soon as her team loses. Right now, James, Lorraine and Kate are all likeable with Kate looking to be the front runner.

Quick Update

OK I've been meaning to update this blog but haven't got round to it, so I'm going try and sum up my recent viewing in this post.

I just completed season 2 and 3 of the US Office, absolute quality. Mike Scott beats David Brent hands down. OK I have to admit Scott's character lacks the realism of Brent but he makes up for it with his zany ways. Who would have thought at the start of Season 3 Micheal would actually hook up with Jan? I feel a bit sorry for Karen, she is way hotter than Pam (although Pam has a better personality) and she gets dumped by Jim having followed him all the way to Scranton. The Dwight vs Andy storyline has been hilarious, but it was pretty obvious Dwight would end up reclaiming his spot as Micheal's right hand man.

Just started watching season two of Bones and I have to be honest, I'm not enjoying it as much as the first season. The cases seem as interesting and gruesome as ever but something just isn't clicking. The addition of Camille isn't necessarily a bad thing, but how many strong willed women does a show need?

I still haven't watched the final four epsiodes of season one of Reaper. But if rumours are to be believed, it won't be coming back for a 3rd series so I don't need to hurry on this one!

I've been trying to get in to the UK version of Life on Mars but I'm struggling. The concept is great, a modern day policeman stuck in the 70's but I'm still not feeling it. Maybe it's because I have no recollection of the 70's?

I saw one episode of Horne and Corden and I have to be honest, it was pretty crap. Looks like the pairs' agent is trying to cash in on them as much as he can before they crash and burn.

Battle in Seattle

Whilst travelling back from Dubai I was flicking through the list of in flight movies when I came across the name Battle in Seattle. I'd never heard of it but the name had me intruiged and when I saw the cast featured Woody Harrelson, Michelle Rodriguez, Andre Benjamin, Ray Liotta and Charlize Theron I decided to hit the play button.

The film centres on the five days in Novemeber 1999 when the World Trade Organisation held it's meeting in Seattle. Protesters from around the globe descended in to the city and as expected things got violent pretty quickly. The story follows a group of protesters (Benjamin, Jennifer Carpenter, Rodriguez, Martin Henderson) and their bid to make a difference, meanwhile on the other side the mayor of Seattle (Liotta) desperately tries to keep the demonstrations from turn ugly and a police officer (Harrelson) has to deal with the fallout of the riots when his pregnant wife (Theron) has a misccariage during the chaos of the riots.

I was pleasantly surprised with this film, having never heard of it despite it's brilliant cast, this film was very enjoyable. There was plenty of information about the WTO and it's history (although how much of it was true I don't know!) and the story was engaging enough to keep me interested right until the end. A decent fell well worth a watch.

2.5 out of 5

Hulk Hogan's Celebrity Wrestling

I actually sat through the whole of this season (8 epsiodes) in about 4 days. The concept was pretty simple, 10 'celebrities' compete against each other to become the CCW Champion. In each episode the celebs are taught 3 moves, they practice them with their trainers Nasty Boy Brian Nobbs and Brutus 'The Barber' Beefcake and at the end of the day they put on a match in front of a live audience. At the end of the evening, the judges, Hulk Hogan, Jimmy Hart and Eric Bischoff, eliminate one celeb.

I have no idea where they dragged the celebs from but they were really scraping the barrel with this lot! The line up consisted of:

Nikki Ziering - Erm... still trying to work out who she is!
Tiffany - Apparently an 80's pop icon!
Frank Stallone - Famous for being the brother of Sylvester
Dennis Rodman - Surprisingly, someone who is actually famous!
Erin Murphy - Tabitha from Bewitched! That was on like a million years ago! Has she had surgery done, she's aged very well for someone who is ancient!
Dustin Diamond - Double D, famous for being Screech back in the day in Saved by the Bell, now famous for being a douche!
Trischelle Cannatella - Apparently she's a reaality star, the best looking of the girls, so she was alright with me!
Butterbean - The guy who knocked Bart Gunn out in WWF back in the day!
Todd Bridges - Wow if you thought Tabitha from Bewitched and Tiffany from the 80's was bad, they managed to drag Willis from out under some rock!
Danny Bonaduce - He's apparently a child star and a radio show host. I like to call him Danny Bona-douche bag!

The first few shows were obviously a little weak as the celebs were still learning the moves. Both Brian Nobbs and Brutus Beefcake came across as really good teachers and really knew their stuff. It was obvious from the start that celebs like Tiffany, Erin and Frank just weren't cut out for the show and they were quickly dispatched with Hulk's "You're a jabroni (sp?) get out of my ring" still ringing in their ears. A pretty lame catchphrase from the Hulkster in my opinion!

I thought Trischelle was by far the best female performer and she proved it by outlasting all the girls and some of the guys too. Her downfall was the hardcore match where she was afraid to take chairshots. Although Butterbean played the part of the big man well (duh! of course he played it well, he's massive!) but personally I thought he was some what overrated by the judges. Dustin Diamond obviously had some passion for the sport and it showed in the way he worked the crowd. But unfortuantely his facial expressions just reminded me of Screech rather than a bad ass wrestling heel! Danny Bona-douchebag is a mad man! The ill feeling between he and Dustin Diamond made for a great hardcore match including one spot where DD tossed Danny through a wall and what did Danny do? He got up and smashed through another part of the same wall! Having said that, Bona-douchebag was a little too cocky, he thought he knew the game too well and his arrogance was his ultimate downfall.

The final was fought between Todd Bridges and Dennis Rodman. The crowd was always red hot for 'Rodzilla' but he seemed to wuss out of a lot of stuff in training. Todd was a high flier who seemed to have a good grasp of the more advanced moves and was generally pretty solid in the ring. He seemed to get the heel psychology down to a tee too. Some of Rodman's colleagues complained that Rodzilla worked too stiff and that he was hurting them but it didn't seem to worry the judges too much as he was crowned the first ever Celebrity Championship Wrestling Champion!

Personally I wasn't too happy with Rodman's win. Bridges was by far the better candidate and the better all round wrestler. What's worseis the fact that everyone who watched WCW back in the 90's will know that Hogan and Rodman are good friends and the two tagged together at WCW pay per view. Sounds like a fix to me!

I enjoyed this and the show has the potential for another season if they could improve their line up a little more. The show format was well done with different types of matches every week that stopped it becoming repetitive and the special guest appearances added more scope to the show. If there is a series 2 I'll probably tune in.

The Office UK vs The Office US

When I heard there was an American version of the Office being produced, I was pretty underwhelmed. The UK version was legendary, Ricky Gervais's potrayal of David Brent was flawless and to think someone else was about to attempt the same character seemed to be suicidal. I'd never heard of Steve Carell until I watched 40 Year Old Virgin and after seeing that I was intruiged as to how he would do as David's reincarnation as Micheal Scott.

It turned out I had very little to worry about, although the US Office stays true to the UK version in style and content, there are slight changes to the format which makes it different. The US version focuses on a lot more characters where as the UK Office was dominated by David Brent and the romance between Tim and Dawn.

Steve Carell is brilliant although his character is a lot more cartoonish and goofy where as Gervais did play it a lit more realistic. Jim and Pam are a perfect fit and they have great chemistry much like Tim and Dawn their British counterparts. But the best bit of acting has to be that of Rainn Wilson who plays Dwight Schrute the assistant to the regional manager! I never thought anyone could beat Mackenzie Crrok's Gareth Keenan but I honestly think Dwight shades it!

I've just finished watching season 1 and have moved on to season 2, both series have been very strong. The great thing is the fact that I am safe in the knowledge that the US version is still running (5 and counting!) so I won't half to worry about it ending anytime soon!

Yes Man

The most memorable part of this film was Jim Carrey getting a blow job from a grandmother. The best part of this film was the credits. The worst part of this film was from the moment I pressed the play button on my DVD player!

The Apprentice - Week 3

Here's the episode synopsis from the BBC site, my comments are below...

The candidates must come up with a completely original product that tones and flexes muscles, and they must create a distinctive poster to promote their product's unique properties. Finally, they must demonstrate their pitching skills to three industry experts in the hope of securing orders. With just a couple of days to complete their task, who has the stamina to keep going, and who will fall at the first hurdle?

Well my dark horse for the contest Maj got the boot in this episode and personally I think it was a mistake because James, as the project manager failed. He's been in the boardroom two weeks running and his time is fast running out.

As far as the products go, Phil's Body Rocka actually looked very cool and you can see why his team won. On the other hand the Empire multi gym was quite frankly sh*t, it was literally a black box with a couple of handles and a step in it. How they managed to blag 500 orders for it I will never know!

The 'race row' was quite interesting for the fact that it was Debra who took up the cause of racism when Yasmina suggested Noorul be removed from the ad campaign because they didn't want the product to look too ethnic. She had a point, although poorly made, but Debra was insulted, OK she feigned outrage more like! I think Noorul was horrified because the girls didn't find him attractive!

Debra was probably a worse leader than Yasmina last week, she just couldn't keep her gob shut and constantly interfered with other members. Having said that, she'll get to the final four I reckon and her sheer veracity will keep her from getting fired a few times. Meanwhile Lorraine continued to make quiet progress in the background and despite a few odd looks from Yasmina and Debra, she handled the pitches to the execs quite well, she's one of the very few likeable characters on the show. Meanwhile, I'm starting to like Phil a lot more, he seems to throw up some good ideas and he seems to put himself up for most tasks and usually succeeds. I had no idea that he was such good pals with Maj until I saw You're Fired. Another Tre and Simon?

Wrestlemania 25 Preview

The biggest night in the WWE year is once again upon us, Wrestlemania 25, this year from Houston Texas. There's a few intruiging matches and a few not so intruiging. Here's some quick thoughts on the card:

25 Diva Battle Royal

Quite frankly the only way this could be entertaining would be if all the Divas were naked! That isn't going to happen so as long as the match is kept fairly short it shouldn't be too pianful to watch. So far 18 divas have been confirmed from Raw, Smackdown and ECW, that leaves 7 former stars to fill the remaining spots. I'm having trouble remembering that many so I will guess Torrie Wilson, Victoria, Trish Stratus and Sunny (Tammy Sytch)will be there, not sure about the other 3 maybe Lita, Marlena and Sable maybe? My pick for the winner and new Miss Wrestlemania is Trish Stratus.

JBL vs Rey Mysterio - Intercontinental Title Match

JBL has promised to make history at WM25. I don't think beating Rey Mysterio counts as being historic and as little Rey Rey has had his ass kicked by practically everyone this year. My guess is that JBL beats Rey and retires as Intercontinental Champion.

Chris Jericho vs WWE Legends Ricky Steamboat, Superfly Jimmy Snuka & Rowdy Roddy Piper
Chris Jericho is the best thing about WWE right now, his one man war against the world has been brilliant, he's by far the best bad guy in the company right now and it's a shame he isn't involved in the title hunt. The build for this match has been great, Jericho has systematically taken the Legends to the cleaners. Unfortunately this match will most likely be the feel good bout of the night, Jericho will dish out much of the punishment only to be beaten thanks to interference from Mickey Rourke and Ric Flair.

Money in the Bank Ladder Match - Kane vs Mark Henry vs Christian vs Finlay vs MVP vs Shelton Benjamin vs CM Punk vs Kofi Kingston

I cannot understand why the hell Mark Henry and Kane are in this match when the likes of John Morrison and Carlito are still around. This year the hype has been focusing on the fact that every MITB winner has gone on to win a champiosnhip so I expect this years winner won't! The build up to this match has been a little weak and despite Kane dominating in the Battle Royal on Raw there is very little possibility that the Big Red Machine will come away victor. CM Punk is probably the only genuine main event talent but I can't see him winning it for the second year in a row so I'm putting my money on the outsider Christian to win it.

Shawn Micheals vs The Undertaker

HBK has done a stellar job keeping this feud interesting and it's good to see him playing a few mind games with Taker. These two haven't had a match at Wrestlemania so I'm expecting this one to be the show stealer. Taker is usually fed poor opposition like Khali and Kozlov so it's great to see him in there with someone the calibre of HBK. You can still be Mr Wrestlemania without winning so I predict the streak will not end here. Hopefully HBK can move on to a world title feud after this.

WWE Tag Team Unification Lumberjack Match - The Colons vs Miz & Morrison

I've not been following Smackdown very much so I'm not sure how they've built this match but they've got four men there who can go some, so we should get a decent match. I'm predicting MizMo to win here and unify the belts. No doubt there will be a free for all at the end with all the lumberjacks getting involved.

Jeff Hardy vs Matt Hardy

I'm not overly excited about this match because Jeff was flying high as a main eventer and his feud with Trtiple H had the potential to be huge. Matt was doing a solid job as the ECW champion and I fear the heel turn has cost him his best singles push. As this is an extreme rules match expect a couple of insane spots and a Jeff Hardy win to put this rivalry to rest.

John Cena vs Edge vs Big Show - World Heavyweight Championship

I'm a big fan of Edge, Big Show is OK and well I'm tired of Cena. The problem with Cena is that he's been made to look invincible and they've made him so cheesy it's ridiculous. I'd love to see Cena turn heel and go on the rampage but I fear that will never happen. Big Show has only been put in this match because Edge vs Cena has been done to death. I fully expect John Cena to win the title and Show and Edge to continue their feud over Vickie for a while longer.

Randy Orton vs Triple H - WWE Championship

I can't say I'm very excited about this, Randy is watchable but Triple H has just lost his way a bit really, I preferred him as a heel to be honest. Triple H has been made to look a bitch by Orton so I predict Hunter gets his revenge and retains his title.

The Apprentice - Episode 2

Quick thoughts on this weeks show:

Anytime anyone on the Apprentice says they are an expert in any field they inevitably end up getting fired. Whilst Yasmina stepped up to the plate (like the pun?!) despite questions from Debra it was Rocky I feared for most as he rattled off his accomplishments in the catering trade.

Yasmina, although very bossy and not allowing any input from her team members seemed to take control, her idea of Mediterranean food was simple and yet could be passed off as quite classy. The guys on the other hand decided to go with sarnies! Surely not the best way to impress a bunch of city slickers! Their Olympic theme also sounded a bit naff and when Rocky suggested the lads dress up in their Olympic clothes I could see a taxi with his name looming ominously.

And in true Apprentice tradition, we got our first cringeworthy pitch/presentation. This time Kate floundered and fluffed her way through a meeting where she admitted she had no clue and referring to Bruschetta as a cold canopy! Back in the car, the ever optimistic Debra moaned that they had already blown the task! Two weeks in and she's already annoying me.

Rocky's next blunder came when he set his team's price per head at £65. Philip looked like an idiot as he tried to pitch it to his customers having to eventually agree to £15 per head. Meanwhile Yasmina's cost cutting seemed to get pretty scary when she went crazy in Asda buying all the cheap stuff to keep her costs down. Man, if I was a customer at her place I'd think twice about the quality of her fare! Her skimping meant her team got humilated when they went to drop off their orders.

But if the girl's food looked bad, the guys came out with kids party food! I'm sure I saw doritos with bits of tomato on them! No wonder they made a loss!

In the boardroom Rocky got the boot even though it looked like James was gonna get it. For some reason Howard reckoned that Rocky should have stayed and one of the other 4 should have gone. I think SAS got it right by sacking the Rock!

Best line of the night came from Nick, when accused of walking around not doing a lot, Noorul tried to deny this fact, but Nick hit hime with "Well I watched you very carefully, In fact I made it my buisiness to watch you for sometime". That's scary!

Right now my favourite is probably Lorraine, she spotted that her team had over spent last week and this week she worked hard and tried to stay positive despite Debra the poison ivy giving up.

The Apprentice - Series 5 epsiode 1

I thought I'd make a few brief comments on the first epsiode of the new series of The Apprentice. First off here's a recap taken from the BBC website:

Project Managers: Mona - Ignite, Howard - Empire

Sir Alan wants to see the candidates get their hands dirty in this task. They've got ten hours to bring in the cash by cleaning and they've got up to £200 to spend on industrial cleaning materials.

Under pressure to start making money, the boys are fast to secure a contract to valet 30 mini cabs. Howard sends half the team to the cab forecourt, while he takes his half out shoe-shining. Back at HQ the girls' faff about choosing their cleaning products. 'Well done,' lawyer Anita announces, as the girls tot up £196 on materials, 'you've spent your budget wisely'.

How hard is it to clean a car? Back on the forecourt the hyped boys' team announce, 'we're Muppets if we can't do these 30 cars. If you're not fast you're going to be last'. Fast forward to 4 pm and only a few cars have been finished and most to a poor standard. Project manager Howard abandons his shoe shining and swoops in to speed up the valeting service.

The girls struggle with their business too. Their offer of £250 for three Hummers is refused. The client usually pays £20 per car. Car cleaning proves lucrative, but it's harder work than they imagined. Debra's splinter team have secured an opportunity to clean a showroom of classic cars, but after taking three hours to clean four cars and smearing a Mustang with shoe polish, the un-amused manager sends the girls packing.

At 7 pm, back in the boardroom the efforts of each team become clear. The girls make ten pounds more than the boys, but lose the task due to the £196 they spent on materials. Debra, Mona and Anita receive a roasting from Sir Alan, but Anita's singled out as the person responsible for the failure of the task. 'You were on the back of the van. You saw the money flowing out,' says Sir Alan. 'You showed no initiative' and Anita is the first casualty of the boardroom.

A good start by the boys but it's plain to see divisions have already started to form. I think Howard did a good job as PM and told Phillip not to clean car interiors, the latter did not adhere to this instruction and the boys found themselves under pressure fromt he start. Meanwhile Howard's team seemed to do well in their shoe shining efforts and made a decent return on their minimal investment.

The girls were disorganised, Mona didn't really seem like she wanted to be PM. Her management of the team was poor and she should have kept tabs on how much money was being spent on equipment. Kate had the right idea when she said they were spending too much on materials but she wasn't vocal enough. In the boardroom Anita got the heave ho because she didn't fight her corner although the real culprit was Mona who now lives to fight another day.

First impressions:

Noorul Choudhury - He reminds me of Mani from series 3, smug and full of himself.

Debra Barr - Loudmouth who got caught out lying in the boardroom by Mona. She'll cause plenty of trouble but I'm sure SAS will like her feisty attitude in the boardroom.

Phillip Taylor - Can't follow orders and I think he's going to try and be a leader from the start.

Mona Lewis - Way out of her depth, talks rubbish and it won't be long before she is gone.

Anita Shah - Unlucky to get fired on this occasion, but lets face it, with a face like hers, she wasn't going to win anything!
No one really shone in this first epsiode

Hell's Kitchen Day 3 & 4

Day 3 started with Chef Ramsey testing the contestants on their knowledge of meat. They had to label 12 types of meat correctly. The second part of the challenge was for the teams to identify which type of meat came from which part of the cow. The guys won the challenge and headed off for their treat while the girls had to first unload a truck full of meat before having to eat various gruesome animal parts.

HK was turned in to a steak house for the evening and steak house worker Giovanni took the meat station in the blue kitchen but his efforts were less than stellar. Meanwhile, Andrea took charge in the red kitchen and led her team to victory. The guys nominated Seth and Charlie and Chef Ramsey got rid of the latter.

Day 4 started with a breakfast challenge where both teams had to cook breakfast for 50 child cheerleaders and footballers. The guys lost the challenge and Seth was blamed be his team mates. Back at the house, Danny and Ben went at it, Ben lost his cool and and told Danny "You couldn't even cook my ****".

The girls went for their treat and the guys were left to do their prep - they didn't complete it. Dinner service was a crash crash with Coi in the Red kitchen feeling the wrath of Chef Ramsey. In the Blue kitchen, enemies Ben and Danny both got an earful and while Seth got an extra special bollocking for wiping his face and then wiping his pan. Ramsey announced both teams as losers and told them to nominate two people for eviction.

Back at the house and Coi openly admitted that she had been terrible, Carol chipped in to say that had Lacey been on that station, it would have been ten times worse! The contestants lined up in front of Chef Ramsey, the boys picked Seth and Ben whilst the girls picked Lacey and Colleen. With Lacey and Colleen both up for nomination, I feared the worst for Colleen but chef picked off Seth. But there was one final twist before the end, Lacey was moved to the mens team much to the joy of Carol.

Lesbian Vampire Disappointment!

Not since the release of Sankes on a Plane was released have I been so disappointed with a film that has an awesome title! But at least Snakes on a Plane had plenty of snakes, In Corden and Horne's latest outing, Lesbian Vampires aren't lesbian enough for my liking!

After being dumped by his girlfriend again, Jimmy (Horne) and his best friend Fletch (Corden) decide they need a break, being skint Jimmy comes up with the idea of a hiking holiday, much to the disapproval of Fletch who is more interested in getting his end away. The pals head off to the village of Cragwich for some peace and relaxation. Upon entering the village, the mysterious locals send the boys to a lodge where they meet a group of female Swedish party goers (although the accents were so bad they could have been American or Irish). At the lodge the travellers fun is short lived as a series of mysterious disappearances throws Jimmy, Fletch and Lotte in to a battle against the Vampire Queen Carmilla.

If you read the last paragraph you may be thinking that this film doesn't sound bad, well let me be perfectly clear, this film is far from good, in fact it, it is terrible! Thankfully for Horne and Corden, they already have a fan base out there and a succesful show because if they were first timers, they would have been finished after this shambles. The script is poor, the gags are non exsistant, the plot is bland and the direction is weak. There is no gore, in fact every time one of the vampires is killed they just spray a load of white goo, hardly terrifying or funny. In fact one must ask, where the hell were the jokes in this 'comedy'? Horne and Corden were one dimensional, both just playing their characters Gavin and Smithy, Corden was reduced to passing off swear words as gags. Lesbian Vampire Killers is sh*t, don't watch it!

HK day 2

After last night’s elimination of Wil, a number of the boys weren’t too pleased at having to spend at least another day with Seth. Day 2 started with an early wake-up call for the contestants, they were assembled outside HK where they viewed the wasted food from the previous night’s service. But Ramsey must have been in a good mood because he didn’t make them swim in it, instead the two teams had to find fish out scallops from a couple of tanks, unfortunately for Colleen, she got very intimate with the scallops.

The challenge was for the contestants to extract the scallop meat, the winning team being the one who could produce the most scallops that met Chef Ramsey’s approval. The boys won by a single scallop. The girls were left to rue their loss as the boys were set to go off on a boat ride. Shortly before the guys were to set off, Ramsey called in Big Robert and advised him that he would not be able to travel with the rest of the team because there was a 300lb limit per person on the boat. I thought this was a little tacky in the sense that this could have been done off camera, making the fat guy feel bad wasn’t really the way to go. But Chef Ramsey appeared to soften by allowing Robert to meet the guys at the Island by taking the ferry across. So we cut to scenes of the boys having fun with Gordon and Seth being extremely scary with all his Ramsey related knowledge. Meanwhile Robert crosses in to the island via the ferry only to be met by the boys and Gordon and told that they are heading back! What a pointless task? Why make Ramsey look like a dick for picking on the fat guy?

Meanwhile lazy Lacey felt the wrath of her teammates when she failed to come down for her team’s punishment. As the teams cleared up after the prep work, Ji twisted her ankle. La was concerned for her team mate, what she should have been more concerned about was the fact that she had been cleaning the floor seconds before the accident occurred, it was all her fault I tell you! During service Colleen got her customary bashing from Chef Ramsey and I have to admire Colleen’s resolve in the face of such criticism. Meanwhile Ji soldiered on despite being in excruciating pain helping her team finish a full service. The boys did likewise and were declared the winners.

Back in the dorm the bitch fest began, Carol went on the attack against Lacey, but truth be told, Carol was not great shakes in the kitchen, at least Lazy ass Lacey has shown some potential. The girls elected to put Lacey and Ramsey’s favourite Caollen up for nomination. But the twist came moments before Ramsey was about to fire Colleen (well he didn’t say it, but we all know he was itching to get rid of her), Ji asked to go as the pain in her ankle was too much. Ji got a send off that’s usually reserved for presidents, whilst Lacey and Colleen live to fight another day!

The Shield

I've finished watching series one (I know I'm so behind when it comes to some shows!) and it was pretty awesome, it's no holds barred and it has the same kind of edge The Wire used to have. One thing I'm still split on is Vic Mackey, the main man of the show. The problem with Mackey is, he doesn't just bend the rules, he's a law unto himself and in the very first episode he shoots dead a cop. Later on we find that he has links with local drug lord Rondell. My favourite ever cop has to be Jimmy McNulty, he liked to bend the rules in order to get the job done and he was a pain in the ass but he never over stepped the mark. Mackey has his good qualities, he looks out for his boys, he's a family man and he does more good than bad.

His war with Aceveda is an interesting one, even though Aceveda is looking to get Vic by the balls, he's having to work with Mackey because he knows, Vic is one of his best cops and without him Farmington would be a very dangerous place.

Personally my favourite character has to be Dutch, he's a bit of a nerd (Like Prez and Lester of The Wire) but he's damn good too! When he busted the serial killer, it was a defining moment for his character.

Hell's Kitchen Season 5

The foul mouthed Brit is back with another season of Hell's Kitchen and according to the blurb at the start, this season has the best candidates in HK history and it's the most exciting season to date. In that case either the contestants on HK series one were really bad or they say the same the thing every year!

This year 300 of the finalists were invited to HK where the final 16 were chosen. Those 16 were then made to cook their signature dishes before Gordon humilated them. Most of the participants seem to have some sort of culinary background ranging from executive chef to line cook.

The first nights service saw Carol from the girls team (who called themselves Team Saffron) and Giovanni from the boys team (The Blues Brothers) to work front of house. Carol seemed to excel in the role whilst Giovanni started off badly and maintained this level for the remainder of the night. Meanwhile Coi and Lacey went at each other minutes before the doors to HK had opened. Lacey said that she wanted to show people that she wasn't just a pretty face. Huh? This girl is delusiuonal, she isn't even pretty! The service went from bad to worse as Colleen and Robert both struggled to get out their starters, meanwhile a power outage in the restaurant caused a delay in service but allowed the would-be chefs some respite from the raging Ramsey. But once service resumed Wil on garnishes found himself the scapegoat in the blue kitchen whilst Colleen in the red kitchen found herself in hot water, unlike her pasta which was raw! Ramsey called for an end as the punters started to head for the door.

Ramsey declared the girls the winners, the deciding factor being Carol's performance on the floor. The guys went back to the dorm to slug it out and decide who would be nominated for elimination, eventually deciding on Seth as the main culprit along with Wil who nominated himself. Ramsey made quick work of the two losers and dispatched Wil in to the abyss much to the other mens disappointment.

It's difficult to make much of the first few series as far as charcters to go but Gordon obviously doesn't have much time for Colleen, the personal chef trainer who hasn't worked as a chef before! Her number will be up pretty soon. Meanwhile Lacey comes across as lazy and it won't be long before she gets the boot. No really likeable characters at the moment so I'll give it a few more episodes before I decide on who I like.

Comic Relief does the Apprentice

I caught the first part of the Comic Relief version of the Apprentice tonight. The boys lined up with Jonathan Ross, Jack Dee, Alan Carr, Gok Wan and Gerald Ratner and the girls team lined up with Ruby Wax, Michelle Moone, Fiona Phillips, Patsy Palmer and Carol Voderman. The guys team looked pretty solid despite being filled with comedians!

The task set this time round was a little different, rather than raising funds from their celebrity friends, the teams had to design and market a new toy. The girls picked Lingerie boss Michelle Moone as their project manager and the boys picked Gerald Ratner as theirs but I think Jonathan Ross really wanted to take the lead.

The guys went with Ross's idea of having a belt with hooks on, with attachable characters to be collected seperately. The girls team went with a velcro body suit with a dice to create a 'Twister' type game. Patsy had a spat with Michelle, because she didn't like being told what to do, although it just made her look like an idiot for walking out and then coming back. The guys seemingly got on well despite Jonathan's best efforts to wind up Jack.

The guy's presentation was far superior, although their product was weak and their add was a little amateurish. The girls had a superior product concept, although the design looked a little cheap, their advert was a lot better than the boys but still lacked quality.

In the boardroom Sir Alan decided quizzed the two teams, Patsy mentioned that she thought Michelle was a bad project manager, hmmm still a bit bitter? Jack came out with the line of the night when he said "Sir Alan, if you are in the mood of firing someone, may I suggest the person who counts the chairs". The girls won the task and one of the boys gets fired on tonights Comic Relief special. I'll take a guess and say Jonathan gets it!

Death Race

Jason Statham has taken a a lot of flack recently, mostly due to how rubbish his Transporter Trilogy was. Personally I liked him in The Bank Job and any bloke who has shagged Kelly Brook is alright in my book! Back to the flick, set in 2012, a bleak future where corporations run the prisons for profit (OK I stole some of that wording from the title sequence!) and Terminal Island Penitentiary hosts the ultimate in voyeuristic destruction - Death Race. The premise is simple, kill all your opponents and be the last man standing, do it 5 times and you're free. Our man Jensen Ames (Statham) is framed for murdering his wife and sent to Terminal Island, it soon becomes apparent that his only way out of jail is to take part in the Death Race as the masked favourite Frankenstien, the original having died in the previous race. Ames soon discovers that the outcome of the Death Race is in the hands of Governess Hennessey and she'll do whatever it takes to make sure Ames stays locked up.

The film isn't great, but it's not awful either and tatham needs to be commended for using that growly voice for the entire film, he must have had a sore throat by the end! There's plenty of action, a fair bit of blood and guts and lots of men standing around admiring their cars. If you want action, a simple to follow story and some testosterone fuelled racing violence then this is the film for you. Easy time pass violence!

House of stars...

Some very familiar faces are popping up in the first Series of House! Some of these characters are from my favourite shows so I thought I'd keep a bit of a tally!

So far we've had;

Robin Tunney (Veronica Donovan - Prison Break)
Dominic Purcell (Lincol Burrows - Prison Break)
Sarah Clarke (Nina Myers - 24)
Lester Carbonell (Richard Alpert - Lost)

And the new character Edward Vogler reminds me of Big Mike from Chuck!

Death at a Funeral

If you’re looking for a mad cap British comedy to watch, check out Death at a funeral. It’s ..... father’s funeral and things aren’t going too well, but with the arrival of a mysterious (short) stranger, things go from bad to worse. There are plenty of familiar faces including Daisy Donovan, Kris Marshall and Keeley Hawes, not to mention a few pooh gags!

Gavin & Stacey

I watched the Gavin and Stacey Xmas special without ever seeing the actual show which had come on and gone on BBC Three. I did find it rather amusing so I decided to check out series one and I wasn’t disappointed! The British don’t seem to churn out quality comedies in the way the Americans seem to, so this was a joy to watch. Not since the days of Men Behaving Badly and Only Fools and Horses have we had such a great show to chuckle along to. The best thing about this brand of comedy is how subtle a lot of the gags are because everything is played out so realistically.

The basic story for the show is the relationship between Gavin and Stacey, Gavin who lives in Essex and Stacey in Barry, Wales. Their love life blossoms on the phone and in the first episode we see the two lovers meet for the first time in London. By the second episode Gavin has proposed to Stacey and she has accepted, the rest of the series follows their journey to their wedding day. The other major plot line is the relationship between Smithy (Gavin’s best mate) and Nessa (Stacey’s best mate), after a one night stand it turns out that Nessa is preggers and Smithy is the father, which would not have been a problem, had the two not hated each other!

The characters Gavin and Stacey are fine, it’s nice to see Matthew Horne move on from his bit part role in the Catherine Tate Show to bigger and better things, but it’s the supporting cast that make this show, what it is. First off we have Smithy, he’s fat, brash and loud but still has an air of cheeky charm about him, his opposite number, Nessa is a big burly welsh lass with a mysterious past. The chemistry between the two is brilliant (which it should be seeing as though they are both co producers for the show!), especially in the first episode when Smithy meets her for the first time and thinks she’s a minger! Even bit part characters like the warring couple Pete and Dawn have me cracking up. But my favourite character by far has to be Bryn played by Rob Brydon. Bryn is an exact copy of Brydon’s previous incarnation, Keith Barrett, who seemed to vanish from our screens all of a sudden. Brydon play’s Stacey’s Uncle who is fascinated by technology and manages to bore anyone and everyone! His refusal to speak to Jason (Stacey’s gay brother) is awkward and hilarious at the same time and we are all desperate to find out what happened between Bryn and Jason on the fishing trip!

I can’t wait to find out what happens in the second series and news coming from Ruth Jones and James Corden is that a third series is a strong possibility!

Hustle

I caught the first two episodes of the latest series and thought they were alright but not as engrossing as previous seasons. Although it was great to see the return of Mickey Briggs, what happened to Stacey and Danny? They were barely mentioned, not to mention the fact that Albert is stuck in prison! I hate it when characters are just dropped without proper explanations like that. The new brother and sister duo are OK but will they fill the void left by Danny Blue and Stacey? The girl looked familiar but I couldn’t recall where I had seen her before, IMDB informs me that she played Mickie in Casualty! I’ve got the rest of the series somewhere so I’ll give it another go soon.